This is the new year that is given us – new, untouched, full of things that have never been.

- Rainer Maria Rilke

There are times in our yearly cycle that invite us to rest, review our lives, and perhaps to initiate some changes. These renewal markers depend on our culture, family, or our personal preferences. They include various calendar New Years, seasonal cyles or markers like the solstices and equinoxes, birthdays and other special occasions. My renewal markers are early January, early spring, and my birthday in September. What are yours?

On Renewal - There is tremendous benefit to the experience of beginning anew, starting over with a clean slate. January often feels like a slate wiped clean. The holidays are behind us. For many, this means an opportunity to slow down, rest, breathe, take a giant exhale. In the colder climates, the weather often supports our natural urge to slow down. No matter where you live, why not take advantage of this symbolic starting-over time of year to rest, reflect, and renew your health, energy, and creativity - perhaps even to make a new resolution or two.

On Resolutions - For some people, New Year's Day and the whole month of January are natural times to set new goals for the year. Perhaps you have already made yours, and are implementing them as you read this? Or, perhaps you are having some difficulty coming up with the right resolution for you this year?

For those of you are definitely NOT into making New Year's resolutions, or who set lots of goals and find that they have not worked for you, I highly recommend this book, just out: Goal-Free Living: How to Have the Life You Want Now! by Stephen Shapiro (John Wiley & Sons, 2006). Here's an interesting statistic from the opening page of the book:

Did you know that ... Only 8 percent of Americans always achieve their New Year's resolutions? 92 percent fail!

This is a staggering statistic! If it's true, why do you suppose this is? And how could you be one of the 8% who succeed?

For those of you who often make New Year's resolutions and then find that they quickly fizzle out, the following Tips article is sure to be helpful.

How often have you made a New Year's resolution that you actually accomplished? The sad fact is that most resolutions made in January become history by February. Why do you suppose this is so?

My hunch is that the two biggest reasons for "Resolution Failure" are: (1) we are not 100% behind the resolution we have chosen, and/or (2) we have chosen a resolution that is overwhelmingly large, complex, or challenging, without building in the time and supports needed to accomplish it.

In making or revising your New Year's resolution(s) for this year, consider the following tips:

• For your resolution, choose a goal that you really, really, really, really WANT to accomplish, not something you feel you "should" do or something that you are not very excited about.
• Develop a laser-like focus. Create one resolution at a time and focus on that one until it is accomplished.
• Create a realistic, manageable goal. If your resolution is a large one, break it down into smaller goals or "baby steps".
• Be careful what you ask for! Be sure your resolution is specific - clearly and simply stated.
• Set yourself up for success. Create a reasonable and realistic goal - one that is do-able in the time frame you have allotted.
• Be sure your goal is measurable in some way - how many, how often, how much, in what time frame, etc.
• State your goal in a positive way. Say what you will do, not what you won't do.
• Set up systems of support for yourself in reaching this goal. Identify people and other resources that will support you in reaching your goal.

In the previous (December 2005) issue of this newsletter, I also wrote an article on creating New Year's resolutions. To read the complete text, click on the link below.

What is the next step after making those New Year's resolutions? Planning, of course, followed by action. Once you have created a goal, you usually need a plan to achieve that goal.

In my Designing Your Life workshop, we work on creating an Action Plan for any major goal. The DYL Action Plan consists of these elements:

1. Objective: A clearly defined goal.
2. Obstacle(s): A list of anything that might interfere with reaching the goal within the specified time frame.
3. Strategy(s): A plan or plans for handling the identified potential obstacles. These strategies become part of your Action Plan.
4. Start Date: This is date that you write the Plan. It is the first Milestone date and is the date on the bottom line of the Action Plan.
5. End Date: This is the target completion date. It is the top line of the Action Plan.
6. Milestones: Identified mini-goals ("baby steps") between the start and end dates - each with a target date of its own.

Action Plans can be used to address any goal, large or small - personal goals, career goals, or business goals. In the process of creating an Action Plan, the steps to achieving your goal become very clear. Then it becomes much easier to prioritize those steps and to focus on handling one step at a time in a logical progression. In using an Action Plan like this, an overwhelmingly large goal may be chunked down into "bite-sized pieces".

If you would like a copy of the Designing Your Life Action Plan template, just email me, using the link below.

Many New Year's resolutions concern taking better care of our health and body in some way - reducing our weight, eating more healthy foods, drinking more water, exercising more, or stopping or changing some habit, such as smoking, that is not serving us.

In my coaching practice, I have found that no matter what the focus of our work together is - whether it is personal, professional, career, or business development, growth, and change - the first issue we often address is the state of the client's self-care practices.

Attention to self-care is vital to the success of any endeavor. Good health and fitness, and a high level of energy, is the best foundation for every aspect of our lives. Unfortunately, many people do not hold self-care as a high priority. Here are some of the most common excuses I hear:

• I'm too busy.
• I don't have time.
• I put others ahead of myself.
• I'm being selfish when I take time for myself.
• It costs too much.
• I can't afford it.
• I'm too stressed out.
• My ____ (fill in the blank) comes first.
• I forget. The time just gets by me.
• I don't know where to start.

What's YOUR excuse?

You'll notice I use the term "extreme self-care". What do you suppose I mean by "extreme"?

If this word conjures up extreme sports like rock climbing or marathon running, or extreme measures like a gastric bypass, starvation, or fasting, this is NOT my intention!

To me, "extreme self-care" means developing and practicing on a daily basis the basic self-care habits. In addition to the concept of consistent daily practice, what makes this "extreme" is that it requires that you put yourself and your self- care first - highest on your list of priorities - before your loved ones, before your work obligations, before your list of "To Do's" - before everything else. Putting yourself first in practicing your self-care is a very challenging thing for most people to do, which is why I label it as "extreme".

Below is a list of some of the Self-Care Basics. Which ones do you already practice? Which ones would you like to add to your practice? What practices that are not listed here would you add to your list?

• Nutrition: Eat three nutritionally balanced meals each day, with perhaps one or two small snacks between meals. Understand the nutritional guidelines for your unique body, and follow those.
• Hydration: Drink at least 8 glasses (64 ounces) of pure water every day. More is better. If you weigh more than 128 pounds, a rule of thumb is to drink the number of ounces that equal half your body weight every day.
• Exercise: Daily exercise for at least 30 minutes per session is ideal. The current minimum suggested by my doctor is 150 minutes of exercise per week in 3-5 sessions (five 30-minute sessions or three 50- minute sessions).
• Sleep: Get plenty of sleep each night. The right amount varies from person to person, but the norm is 7-8 hours of restful sleep each night. Be sure you use a good mattress that is right for your body.
• Stress-Reduction: Build stress-reduction practices into your daily routine. These practices could include exercise, meditation, yoga, tai chi, dancing, singing, listening to music, massage, humor and fun.
• Health Maintenance: Have regular medical check- ups, complete annual exams, and routine tests such as breast exams, mamograms, Pap tests, blood pressure checks, chlolesterol testing, routine bloodwork, etc. Consider health-promoting appointments with chiropractors, natureopathic doctors, nutrionists, accupuncturists, massage therapists, etc. Consider adding vitamin, mineral, and fiber supplementation to your diet, and be sure to educate yourself about them and get professional guidance in using these products.
• What else would you add to this list to personalize it for you?

If you are a woman living in the Cape Ann area, you are invited to attend my free workshop on Practicing Extreme Self-Care, to be held at Curves in Rockport on Wednesday, January 18th, from 7-8pm. To register, call Curves at 978-546- 6900. [Snow date: January 25]

Rilke's words "full of things that have never been" always create a faster heartbeat within me. Like Emily Dickinson, "I dwell in possibility." Our March newsletter will be devoted to this topic. Stay tuned!

Writing Your Life is a workshop for anyone who wants to explore his/her life through writing. In this 6-week creative writing course, we look at various ways to write about self, including journaling, blogging, memoir, personal essay, poetry, and autobiography.

This workshop/class is offered through the Corporate & Community Education Division of the North Shore Community College, located at the Cummings Center in Beverly, Massachusetts. We meet Tuesday mornings from 9:00-11:30am from March 7th through April 11th. The fee is $129 To register, call 978-236-1200.